This month I am sharing with you the four main ideas, concepts or ways that I work with individuals and teams. First up, #leadyourway.
Leading is not managing
Leadership is about having a dream and getting people to follow your dream. Management is getting people to do things. That is a whole different topic. But having said that, you won’t need to manage as much if you learn to lead more powerfully.
Who do you follow?
Think of someone you follow. It could be a celebrity on tv, a motivational speaker or writer on Facebook or an insightful leader or even perhaps a politician that you believe in.
Why do you follow them?
You follow them because they are unique. They don’t do, act, and say the same boring things as everyone else. They have a unique way of getting their point across. If you are into inspiration maybe the booming voice of Tony Robbins is your thing. Perhaps instead you prefer the quiet often humorous style of Eckhart Tolle. Maybe you are an Oprah fan and then again, maybe not.
The point is your follow people because they have style, personality and a way of being that fits for what you are looking for.
What does #leadyourway mean?
The same is true in leadership. People follow someone because as Simon Sinek says, they believe in what you believe. How though will someone know what you believe if you don’t say it and/or demonstrate it. How will someone know they want to follow your cause, if you don't stand up for what you believe in?
Who are you any way?
#Leadyourway begins with the concept of figuring out who you are.
You started this in high school when you picked out your clothes to fit in with a particular group, styled your hair in a certain way and listened to a particular genre of music. You were trying to figure out where you fit and you were trying to find out your own identity.
Somewhere in college and into adulthood your blending in got less overt. Instead of dying your hair pink, you just started to nod more. You spoke out less. You found the politically right things to say. You learned what leaders wear and you bought those outfits. You listened to the news and found out what the arguments were for your organization and you used the right language. You took training on how to manage, how to lead, and your followed your mentors lead. That is if you had a mentor. You conformed. Now, you fit in. But are you comfortable? Are you your authentic self?
What do you believe?
In my work, I help people reconnect with what they believe and identify what they stand for. I help leaders come back to who they are, at the core of their being. There is no point in pretending to be something we are not. The rest of the world can sniff a faker out in a heartbeat.
If I try to pretend that my heart doesn’t live on my sleeve, the only way to do that is to become unfeeling. Cold. That is certainly not me! I cry at every commercial and X-Factor video. That’s who I am. When my client, on the other end of the phone, tells me a story about her pain, I often have to swallow and take a moment to ask the next coaching question, because I am so moved by their pain. That is who I am. That will come through in my leadership as well.
. My passion also shines through with my energy and enthusiasm. This is something I tried to tone down for many years. This left me appearing flat and boring rather than alive and passionate. Wouldn’t you much rather have someone lead you that is passionate and alive?
1. Look back on peak moments in your life and in your career.
Those times when you felt amazing, on top of your game and were achieving the results you wanted.
Look for themes. Identify when you were most authentically you.
2. Review the assessments you’ve done in your career
Look again for the themes that come out in them.
3) Consider when you feel most authentic and in integrity in your leadership.
4) Make a list of who you are when you are at your best.
Then be you more often!
I lead a full life full of love, adventure and growth. Check out my latest thoughts here.
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